DOLPHINS! DOLPHINS! DOLPHINS!

Hi,

So remember a few months back I mentioned I was going on a holiday to Florida with a charity called dreamflight (they take children with life changing disabilities and illnesses to the theme parks of Orlando for ten days without their parents)  yeahhhhh so that happened......eeeeeekkkkkkkkk....

I came back a few days ago so I'm still jet lagged, so apologies if if this post doesn't make any sense!! 

What to talk about first????! I know the highlights! 

For me, and probably most of the other 191 (192 including me) VICs (Very Important Children) one of the biggest highlights was swimming with dolphins. It was an phenomenal experience - from touching/stroking them (they feel like rubber if you ever wanted to know, think of hard boiled eggs, same texture) to being able to watch the other kids in your group, of whom the majority of wouldn't shut up about how excited about it since the coach journey down to Heathrow, swim with Cindy (Cindy was our dolphin) and feeling sooo happy for them, to then swimming with one for myself with the BIGGEST grin on my face cause we were all buzzing for eachother. It was truly amazing and one of the best days ever! And being in the Dolphin group made it just that much more perfect. The only downside to that day was getting in and out of a wetsuit....I swear I'm never putting myself or anyone else through that EVER again. 

Another highlight was the early morning and after park swims we had. I know the idea of waking up at 6 am to go swimming isn't that appealing to most back home, but when you are there and it's already like 20 degrees outside in a heated pool underneath the stars watching the sun rise it makes it the best time to be awake, especially when the pool was practically empty. What made it even better was that former DF child Paralympic swimmer Liz Johnson was sitting with pool patrol most mornings and as she has practically the same type of Cerebral palsy to me she helped me improve my technique so I stopped going round in circles. I'm no Paralympian that's for sure but I definitely gain confidence and that's one of the many goals of dreamflight.

The funny thing is that I never expected it to have such an dramatic affect on me, I thought could just get on with normal life after being dropped off at the coach station and I wouldn't cry as we said goodbye to people from our group who left at Heathrow airport to go home. But I did cry and I haven't stopped thinking about dreamflight since I got home. It's so wonderful and strange how attached to people over ten days.

I have so many thank yous to say to everyone from the Dolphins group. 

Firstly to my Escort/carer for the trip, Ellie. Thank you for everything you do and for giving up your time to help the Dolphin kids like me for ten days. I know I've already said this in person but  thank you for having the patience and heart to take me and my roommate under your wing (or maybe more appropriately 'fin' -since we are dolphins) and supporting us so that we could have the best ten days possible without having to worry about our conditions and stuff like that, I know we are both missing your random dancing and cuddles already xxx 

Jo, dolphin leader, this couldn't have been as awesome a trip without your years of dreamflight experience. Everyone knew what to do and from a kid's perspective everything seemed to just flow (as a said before I'm still jet lagged I know this doesn't make sense!)

All the American helpers, you guys are awesome, as you would say. I don't think someone of you realise how important your volunteering is to how this charity operates from pushing wheelchairs to decorating the hotel, without your time and contributions the holiday would have been so much less lively and less fun for everyone. All the Americans that helped the Dolphins I will never forget you. thank you for all your support and for bringing so many smiles to everyone's faces.

The BA crew, Leanna and Claire, you both are incredible! I really can't put in to words the gratitude I think every single Dolphin kid has for you. From the hugs and hot chocolates to being on pool patrol and doing your real job of looking after us on the plane journeys, you did it in such style and you can just tell you are such kind and considerate people from the smiles on both your faces. I would have never have guessed how big your roles would be within the group but the both of you were as caring for me and my Roommate as Ellie was, and that really surprised me. Also side note: you were  both so good at putting on my leg brace and I was very impressed by that as well xxx

Finally Pat (founder of dreamflight): 

I just want to say a big thank you to you for starting up a charity which over its 30 years has impacted so many people's lives. I have learnt things about myself over the ten days that I would never have realised if it wasn't for dreamflight and I have met so many amazing people and friends whom I will never forget sharing once in a lifetime experiences with. Thank you for dreamflight; it's boosted my confidence and self-believe and I hope it carries on to change people's lives for another 30 years. Thank you . 

I can't believe it's actually finished, dreamflight 30 is over, the best days I've had in forever are done;I won't see my dolphins til March time *sad face*  BUT roll on the reunion! 

It was an extraordinary trip. At some point I will be doing something to fundraise for this awesome charity but in the meantime here is the link to find out more:

http://www.dreamflight.org

Byeeeeeeee

Politics

Hi,

One thing nobody really teaches you is how politicised having a disability is. The state metaphorical tossing you aside and saying your a waste of resources. Especially now, your whole being in society, government wise, determined to whether you can work. If you can, you're not disabled 'enough' and get practically nothing. If you can't, you're lazy and deserve the bare minimum.

  

Accessibility is seen as a burden and us becoming too demanding, as the greedy they claim us to be. We turn invisible, subhuman ; the others. We are portrayed by them as burdens to society for simply wanting to exist in the world as any other person does.

 Weekly survival is one thing that is in constant jeopardy. From losing jobs due to sick days, to rising costs of adaptations and accommodations  (and cuts to services that provide them). The threat of your support from the state disappearing because of austerity, most likely, that they caused and are failing to stop - the list goes on.

Most right to die advocates passionately fighting for euthanasia to be legalised, instead of fighting for equal rights for PWDs. Doesn't sound right in my opinion. Not fighting for accommodations. Not fighting for accessibility. Not fighting against cuts which put PWDs in these dire conditions that they think this is the way out. Instead fighting for our right to die, and not improving the situations we have been put in today.

Think about it, disability and politics go hand in hand. Scary right?? 

Savio and Dreamflight

Hi,

So you can probably tell by the title, this blogpost is about my week instead of some hard-hitting disability information. I've done a lot this week to be honest and I'm extremely excited about one thing, but more on that later!

Both Monday and Tuesday were pretty ordinary: 6:45 am wake up for school, trying to drink 2 litres plus of water (drunk about 4 each day), going to school on 5 hours sleep due to a mix anticipation of the fore coming days and well how can I put this, social media! Also I had to finish packing. Anyhow I don't have much to say about those 2 days apart from they were pretty much normal and okay!

Then came Wednesday, the first day of retreat. Again I only had roughly 6 hours sleep for the same reasons (damn it snapchat!) I arrived at school like normal on the council transport bus, but instead of a school bag in my chair, a suitcase and I headed up to the PE department to drop off my stuff and sign in. Pretty straight forward. Then it was time to get on the coach AKA the part when all the unflattering Snapchat stories commenced (E, I'm talking to YOU!) and we drove for goodness knows how long until we arrived at Savio. For the rest of the day it was mainly settling in and stuff like that.


Thursday is when all the main religious stuff took place. ( I go to a catholic school, what do you expect) a reconciliation service and one of the most comical Masses I've experienced, isn't hard to claim that title haha, happened. It was just funny, I can't really explain why. Later that night it was the disco and I can honestly say I've never seen so many people trying to the Macarena in such close proximity to each other. The whole thing was hilarious especially getting teachers to dab.


Friday came round soon enough, by this point I was shattered, completely and utterly shattered. The majority of the day was spent doing affirmation, basically writing nice stuff about other people. We had our lunch of fish fingers, then we packed the coach and climbed aboard for our trip home. Surprisingly leaving Savio was more emotional than I first anticipated. It felt weird, like I wasn't ready to go back to school. Anyway we arrived back about 3.15 and it was starting to rain. Classic British weather. With the help of one of my teachers, I got all by stuff into my mums van and we drove home.

Whilst driving, Mum said something along the lines of "I've got something really exciting to show you when You get home, and I need to film it." This really started puzzle me and a load of irrational ideas popped in my head. She said it with a wicked smile on her face, so I knew it would be something I was going to be excited about.
We got home, by then I was fully shaking with anticipation. I sat in the kitchen at the table; my mum brought through a a4 envelope and started filming. I opened said envelope which had a letter in it, at the top of the letter it said in big bold letters 'your child has been chosen to go to Orlando, Florida with dreamflight Oct 2016' not going to lie I screamed.

Apparently when we first met my neurologist, I was 1, the head nurse Jane, mentioned to my mum this charity, dreamflight, which takes disabled children aged 8-14 to all the major Orlando theme parks and said I may go with them one day. For the last few years Jane kept on saying I wasn't ready until my last appointment late last year. And my neurologist has been doing the nomination form behind my back. In fact my mum found out that I got a place around a month ago! And all my carers knew. And everyone kept it a secret, which knowing some of my carers, must have been really hard!

So I'm going to go to Orlando! Ekkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk I'm so so grateful and super excited. It's like 115 days away (not like I'm constantly counting down or anything- honest!)

Byeeeeeeee

OMG blog-aversary alert!!!!!!!

Hi,

You know what I've just realised? I've been doing this for a whole year. Uno año! It's super surreal that not only have I stuck with it (my biggest commitment- well apart from vegetarianism) its that people even bother reading the ramblings that I some how scrape into a post,I can't imagine a room of 1000 people let alone 14 thousand people, it is slightly scary to think that that's the amount of views I have at present.

So no matter if your someone I know, my friends or teachers, who I feel like I've forced this all down their throats over the last 12 months- sorry about that!- or if your a person who's come here on their own accord, thanks for reading, thanks for talking and most importantly thanks for putting up with me, I'm definitely not the best disability blogger out there BUT I am on the second page of Bing, which I think is an achievement considering the random stuff on Bing. 

I literally feel like this Dog at the moment 

Anyways,

Byeeeeeeeeeeee

Hollywood

Hi,


(Trigger warning: suicide)

So, all of the time we hear of celebrity endorsed campaigns and charities in aid of suicide prevention. Normally addressing the viewer directly and the celebrity talking about their own attempted suicide or about a case study, reassuring those watching they aren't alone and said charity will help them, if they reach out to it. We are all familiarised with these ways breakthrough. Even Hollywood films are used to spread these vital messages, right?
For any able-bodied person, the answer, in general, would be yes. So why are Hollywood writers and directors telling a completely different message to the disabled community?

So many films are depicting the life of a PWD isn't worth living, that we are supposedly wanting to kill ourselves to end our 'suffering'- that that's the only way to escape what 'unfair' lives we live. That we aren't worth it.

A extremely recently film, me before you, is in a line of rom-coms to go down this plot route. Although I personally haven't seen this film, from reading articles and reviews of it, this is what many disability activists make of it.

(The striped back plot is that a guy named Will is super rich with a city job, but becomes quadriplegic after an accident. His carer,Louise, is horrified when Will wants to visit an assisted suicide clinic to end his life. The pair obviously fall in love, but Will still wants to go ahead with his original plan.)

At the film premiere the activism group 'Not Dead Yet' staged a protest and some activists have voiced their discomfort with the plot
“The message of the film is that disability is tragedy and disabled people are better off dead,” said disabled activist, Ellen Clifford.  “It comes from a dominant narrative carried by society and the mainstream media that says it is a terrible thing to be disabled.”

I don't really know what to make of this topic to be honest. On one hand I feel like it provokes discussion about disability which are extremely important to get into mainstream media. However, it literally leaves a window of opportunity for so many people to stereotype PWDs as suicidal, due to the fact that there is a lack of representation of PWDs in films and TV shows.
But one thing that I'm sure of is that Hollywood has created this plot line and pulling the pity card to get more money. Always the case!

Anyway, sorry this is so late- lack of inspiration

Byeeeeeeeeee

Invisible disabilities.......

Hi,

Now, something that really bugs me is when arrogant people think that invisible disabilities/mental illnesses aren't a thing. In fact one in ten children, aged between 1 and 15, live with some form of mental illness/distress and 1 in 4 adults will experience some form of diagnosable mental heath illness in one year, with 1 in 6 adults experiencing this at any given time. According to a 2001 record, it says mixed anxiety and depression are the most 'common' mental illnesses in the UK. So in reality, invisible/mental illnesses are so widespread and can affect anyone. 

I don't want to come across as nagging or anything but here are a list of things anyone shouldn't say to a person with a invisible disability, and yes I know and am aware I've been doing a load of lists recently, sorry if they are getting tedious!

So here's the list:

1. You have what? I've never heard of it (Well your not the expert, they are)

2. You need to exercise more (Believe it or not, some peoples disabilities aren't cured by the supposed 'miracle' of working out)

3. Aren't you feeling better yet? (This can make people feel a hella lot worse tbh)

4. But you look fine. (The key is in invisible and mental)

5. Maybe anti-depressant would help? (Maybe that person doesn't want to be medicated)

6. You are taking too much medicine. (Are you in the medical profession and their doctor? No? Not your decision)

7. You need to change your diet (Unless you are their dietician/doctor or them-self, not your problem)

8. It's all in your head! (Yes that may be true, not really its very helpful)

9. Losing weight will help. (Again, not always a miracle cure)

10. If you just had a more positive attitude....(Don't you think they try that every minute of the day?)

Sorry its so short,

HALF TERM HOLIDAY!!!!! YAY

Byeeeeeeeeeee

Language recap........

Hi,

(Trigger warning: ableist language)


I've written about this sort of thing before and I just want to recap it because as I've been more aware of it, it's been like driving me up the walls when I notice it at school from both teachers and pupils and it's ableist slurs.

The most common one I hear on a day to day basis is 'cr*zy'. Basically it the raw form it's an ableist/psychophobic slur used to ultimately degrade people who have or suffer from mental illnesses/distress and it should be only used by a person who is part of said community when describing themselves. (e.g I call myself a 'cr*pple' sometimes although my peers cannot call me it without explicit consent, if that makes sense!).

But in today's world it has come to be a everyday thing in 3 core different situations, here are some alternate words to use:

Situation 1.
When describing something intense
Eg someone saying "she's a little cr*zy" or even "that was cr*zy/ins*ne" (it applies to synonyms too)

Alternative words:
Excessive
Extreme
Vivid
Unimaginably
Ridiculously
Impassioned
Hugely
Intense

Situation 2.
When describing something negative/traumatic
Eg "the car crash was cr*zy" or "injustice in the 21st century is cr*zy"

Alternative words:
Alarming
Chilling
Horrific
Frightful
Distressing
Eerie
Hellish

Situation 3.
When describing something unusual/ridiculous
E.g "You have some cr*zy habits." Or "This place is ins*ne." (Again synonym)

Alternative words:
Absurd
Bizarre
Unrealistic
Illogical
Preposterous
Unconventional
Inappropriate


I just want to put it out there- I'm not writing this in order to shame you, I just want to spread awareness of what these words originally meant and say that we should be a bit more mindful of language choices which could offend; yet we are still human, slipping up is certain inevitable, that's okay. I just want people to at least try and get it out of the norm of social interaction- at least once.

Byeeeeeeee

guest post..............

Before I show you this post, I just want to say a huge thank you to the person who wrote it, you know I've been feeling rubbish recently and this made me so much happier, I cried and I never get that emotional over stuff like this:

So here it is ladies and gents,

Hello there! 

I’m some stranger that you readers aren’t used to…and I feel honoured to post a lovely, cheesy rant on the CP Blog! So, lets say I’m called ‘E’. HI then! I’m ‘E’ and I feel like me and Ruthie have been friends for most of my life, and that we’ve known each other for ages (because of how well we get on!). When really, we’ve only known each other for a few years.

It all started in a science lesson, when I was seated next to Ruthless. Firstly, she came across as a very friendly, brainy person, with her infinite tallness…AND-Since I would always have trouble crawling through science, Ruthie would be by my side, helping me out with explanatory speeches of what I’m stuck on, and often a ‘Copy my answers, then!’ tactic. Soon our friendship was already beginning to make an appearance! She had me laughing with her random outbursts of One Direction songs (Even though she swears she doesn’t like them!). Also, the CP Blogger totally blew me away with her knowledge! SHE’S SO CLEVER. I don’t care what you say, Ruthie! You are and you know it! Moving on, every Science lesson, I could feel our relationship getting thicker, stronger, between us. Like a magnetic pull - accept we weren’t THAT forcefully attracted to each other! *well I think I messed that simile up…*

Moving on, Ruthie is a brillant friend. She’s so independent, glowing with inspiration, and I’ve just gotta love her to bits no matter what! Since, our friendship is a long, firm chain. More links are added the more personal, deep secrets we blurt to each other, and the inside jokes that never get old. This ‘chain’ does have it’s rusty sections, but it has it’s stronger parts, too. 

Every time I see Ruthie, she has a wide grin plastered across her face, which is usually followed with a series of looks exchanged between our locked eye contact (Those looks carry so much inside jokes, and inappropriate laughter at things that only us will ever know about…hehe!) 

ANYWAY-finally! I’ve pretty much done now. Sorry to bore you all with my long, more personal rant. As you can see, mine and Ruthie’s friendship has A LOT to say! What about the fact : we already know way too much about each other that we’re stuck as friends for eternity? Or : we’re both so weird but we still choose to be seen with each other? ETC. So, thank you for coming on this long-winded journey through many words, and mainly for getting to the end of this post! 

Good bye! X

Really? Faking disability......

Hi,


Okay,


Why do some people still think that people fake having disabilities?

I personally have never heard of someone faking their disability to get special accommodations or  'treatment' as some may put it. We constantly are fighting a losing battle to prove ourselves of our disabilities in order to get the support/accommodations we need for school, work and everyday life, especially when the PWD has an invisible disability that others don't realise because they 'don't look disabled'.

Of course accusing someone of faking a disabilities, especially an invisible on, is being ableist and harmful towards that individual! As a member of the general public it is not your place to ask for evidence, such as audiologist graphs for proof of deafness or to see medication for depression, you aren't helping them. (It sounds far-fetched, it does happen!) 
By doing this sort of thing it's making it harder for PWDs to advocate themselves BECAUSE they are wasting their time trying to prove they have disabilities, instead of focusing on improving accessibility and spreading awareness.

Even IF that particular person was lying, let that part of the disabled community handle it themselves! It's not any other person's place to generalise that all people with that certain disability are lying from that point onwards.

We don't need, nor want generalisation to shadow our community.

Byeeeeeeeeeeeeee

PSA: wheelchair users...........

Hi,
This is going to only short PSA (public service announcement) but it's very important too realise and I've mentioned it in previous post but I feel on behalf of the disabled community, I need to re-empathise this.
Wheelchairs are uses for ambiguous reason aside from paralysis, it could be very painful for that person to walk, it could be due to over tiredness, not have the strength to walk, hyperflexibility, shortness of breath/low lung capacity, fragility of the muscle, joints or skin.
People stop harassing wheelchair users when they stand up and walk with out the aid of the chair in public! They're not trying to get attention, they're not even trying to impress you- they are purely trying to do their day to day business, likewise to you, and it is not your place to determine whether or not that person needs an mobility aid, such as a wheelchair. 
You aren't a doctor- and trust me, they know their needs a hella lot better than you will.
Thanks Sincerely,

The semi-wheelchair user community
PSA/Rant concluded- you are free to go!
Byeeeeeeeeeee

25 facts about me.......

Hi,

So I've hit 10k views on my blog and to celebrate I've decided to do a 25 facts about me post as there is a lot of new readers on here so what a better time for you lot to get to know me?

I just want to thank all of you for reading these weird trails of thoughts and lets hope there will be many to come!

25 facts about moi

1. Zodiac sign?

I'm an Aries and I feel I fit my traits extremely accurately

 

2. 3 fears?

I'm claustrophobic, scared of confrontation in some way and I'm scared of being lonely

 

3. 3 things I love?

My friends and family, studying (not necessarily school) and blogging 

 

4. My best friend?

Well I have around four close friends and they all read my blog- I ain't doing favouritism

 

5. The last song I listened to?

Either 'Daddy' by Emeli Sandé or 'uninspired' by Lucy Spraggan

 

6. The reason I started to blog?

To make people aware of ableism from the perspective of a teenager with a physical disability 'cause sometimes hearing it from an able-bodied so called disablity expert don't cut it!

 

7. How I feel right now? 

Alright I guess 

 

8. Something I really want? 

FOOD or MONEY just kidding I don't really know

 

9. Current relationship status?

Single and I don't really want to change that at the moment 

 

10. My favourite movie?

Probably the divergent series

 

11. My favourite songs?

Basically anything by Lucy Spraggan 

 

12. My favourite artist?

Lucy Spraggan (how could you guess!)

 

13. 3 things that upset me?

When people are treated unfairly, when people use ableist slurs without understanding how harmful they can be to people and when people patronise me.

 

14. 3 things that make me happy?

Friends and family, some aspects of school (yes, yes I'm the geek and teachers pet, can't help it!) and blogging my opinions  I guess

 

15. Some one I miss?

A friend with the nickname Ralph 

 

16. 3 things that annoy me?

Any form of ableist language coming from my friends, patronising people, when people assume stuff about me

 

17. One thing I've lied about?

I don't lie but like maybe about my age

 

18. Something that's constantly on my mind?

School work or someone (not telling who)

 

19. My future goals?

To stick at blogging and advocacy and to educate my generation about ableism 

 

20. Do I want tattoos?

Yeah/maybe they have to mean something that's permanent for me to get one, so probably it will be something disability related 

 

21. Something I believe in? 

Equality: no matter what race, sexuality or difference 

 

22. Favourite quote?

'No amount of smiling at a flight of stairs has ever made it turn into a ramp'- Stella Young

 

23.First thing I notice in a person?

If they are trustworthy or not

 

24. Favourite subject?

RE or English 

 

25. Random 

I can't really properly lie to people I know who have brown hair and blue eyes face to face for some reason

So that's my 25 facts and another Huge thanks for 10,000 views I mean I'm not that interesting, surely?

Anyway 

Byeeeeeeeeeeee

Wheelchair observations

Hi,

So you won't be aware but I've sprained my ankle last week and the doctor has said 'Don't be a hero' and 'Use your wheelchair when in pain' now neither of those are very natural to me anymore and today I'm going to be focusing on the wheelchair side of things from my perspective. Here's a list of funny/awkward things that I've noticed happen when I'm in the chair.

1. Higher voices.
Whenever I'm in my chair it seems that people's vocal range changes, as soon as I am sat down their voices go an octave higher. I probably just being paranoid but I see it all the time.

2. Rookie drivers
I'm always surrounded with really helpful people, which I'm really thankful for by the way, but it seems like as soon as they get hold of the handles- it's like formula one. I'm either going 1000 miles per hour or I'm going to end up getting flipped out of my chair. And you know who the worst are at doing this? Teachers 100 percent (but that's a whole different blogpost)

3. Crowds
The most annoying thing ever! Why, you ask? Think very carefully, where is my head in comparison to a relativity tall person...... Yeah..... That gives another meaning to the word butt-head

4. Lifts
Yes, I get that there are lifts in most buildings but trying to get to them is the hard part. With my luck (note I sprained my ankle the day before my birthday) I'm in a class room that is across the entire school from a lift and I have to push myself all the way there or the lift directly next to the classroom is out of order; even worse I'll get stuck in a lift at school, like last year, again another story.

5. Conversations
Now I'm a tall person, 5ft 9 with boots, so I understand this from both sides. So whenever I'm talking to someone who is walking and is fully standing, especially when it's busy, it just seems like a eternity of 'what?! say that again' or 'pardon' (depending on who I'm with!) I am not the sort of person to repeat over and over again and that's why I'm an antisocial semi-wheelchair using teenager - I give up!

6. The 'you can actually walk face'
OMG, call the press I'm a wheelchair user that, you may want to sit down for this- it's shocking, CAN walk! (Such the con-artist!) WOW can you believe some people use chairs for other reasons than they can't physically walk? The funny thing about this is I normally stand up mid push and looking around there's at least one person who hasn't scraped their jaw off the floor. Must be a miracle, huh?!

Most of these are just jokey, don't take it that seriously and for people who know me, these aren't meant to be aimed towards anyone- just some generalisations.

Byeeeeeeeeee

A poem: them

Hi,

So something  you may not know about me is that I like to write poems. I don't know why but I just do, and they are probably all really bad and cringey. They are mostly just random and I just write, likewise with blogging, and basically see what happens to be honest. 

This Poem is quite deep and it is basically my view on the UK government and what they are doing within the disabled community, although it doesn't really portray that very well.

So here is my attempt of a poem:

Them

By the CP blogger/Ruthie Hayward

They label me,
categorically organise me,
They place me in the suffocating box afar from my reality,
They are afraid of my definition chains,
of my difference from the norm in our corrupt society,

Their propaganda says we aren't pure and idealistic perfection,
So we are to blame for their criminal inflictions,
That we brought it on ourselves,

The knife of their cuts, their first weapon of choice,
Some are stranded- without a voice,
Alone and abandoned by our leaders,
A running man without sneakers,

How on earth did they get power,
And when so many are suffering in the darkest hours,
The hardships my community face,
Well, we can't keep up with your sick game of chase,

They will continue to label me,
To categorically organise me,
They will carry on to place me in the suffocating box afar from my reality,
They still are afraid of my definition chains,
Of my differences,
Of what makes me me,
The D word,

And you have no idea,
Because of them,
You have no idea.

I hope you like it,

Byeeeeeeeee

Pathetic sob stories

Hi,

This is a weird blog post for me to write because it could be perceived as me B**ching (woo I swore sorry) about the disabled community, it's not. My blog, my opinion- just saying.

You know what I absolutely hate? When parents/guardians of PWDs use their children's disabilities as a sob story. Okay, I understand that finding out and diagnostic tests can be traumatic experiences and I totally get that medical terminology is like an alien language; what I don't get is when parents take it a bit too far and use it to draw sympathy and attention to themselves and make it out like they live such a hard life all because their child has a disability.

So before you even consider having a child, you should be ready to handle a disabled child, twins, or a child who has a different sexuality to you. 'Cause if you're not ready to 'cope' with a child who isn't straight/cis or able bodied/ Neurotypical, they are going to be, in one form or another, abused for many years to come.


And even if you get the 'dream' baby you may have a feminine boy or a masculine girl, you need to be able to let them be who they are not how you imagined them to be- they aren't your property.

I am so fed up with and tired of parental sob stories about how 'hard' it is to 'raise' who is different from the perfect or norm.


You know what's harder then those pathetic sob stories? The child knowing that they have almost let down their parents for existing in a way their parents didn't ask for and worse living knowing that they weren't what their parents were planning or expecting. And for so many people this is the reality however unrealistic it may seem.

Let's let that sink in

Byeeeeeeeee

So I found this...........

Hi,

Couple of things before I start: 
Uno- this blog now has an Instagram, go follow @theCPblogger for updates (And there is a link at the bottom as well)
Dos- I am FINALLY on Easter break whoop-whoop!
Tres- we've only gone and got 6k views.....PARRRRRRRTTTTTYYYYYYYY. THANKS YOU LOT!

Now lets get on with this...

Okay, so before I properly started blogging, I entered a writing competition and nothing really came about it; so the other day I was looking at my entry and well its quite something. All I'm going say is that we were given the brief it had to be based on an experience or opinion.......  

Just because I’m disabled it doesn’t means I’m thick or a baby!

Ok then, as a 12 year old disabled girl, who goes to a mainstream school, I’m going to get bullied, aren’t I? So far, in my eventful life, I haven’t been constantly bullied, as I’m very fortunate to have brilliant friends who stick up for me; it’s not really that bad. Yes, I may have a psycho arm, which is ruthless and without me controlling it - most of the time – it hits people without warning (which is thanks to my cerebral palsy!) I have to have a bulky wheelchair that gets me a lift pass, which to be completely honest with you is one of the perks of being disabled, but yet having the chair means I have to leave for classes earlier to get to them on time-so it has its positives and negatives. For me, it’s not that big of a deal because ‘I just shake it off, shake it off’. Sorry for the Taylor swift reference, I couldn’t stop myself!

So, the one thing that really bugs me about school, is the fact that people automatically, without even thinking, assume that I’m thick or I’m a big baby. This is because in my profile, it says in big… bold… letters SEN. The easiest way to describe what SEN means is, that I am disabled! When people see these three letters they normally start treating me like a toddler, I’m a year 8 pupil for the record, stop treating me like a freaking baby!

For example, way back in year 6, our teacher was working with my table and we were doing about ww2 evacuees. I was working by myself, not struggling or anything, but she still came and sat next to me. I thought to myself “well this feels a bit intimidating and strange but ok, I’m fine with Miss ****** sitting that close to me whilst I work.” (I’m not saying her name and also it isn’t a swear word that I use as nick name for her either! Promise!). So I carried on working. When I was starting to do the arty bits she asked me “Oh Ruthie, let me help you with that.” She proceeded to move my work nearer her; in my head I was thinking, “Oh hell no!” but I said instead “Oh I can cope on my own thanks.” Came out. And I slid my work back. You may think that was just her trying to help me, but the thing that got me was later that lesson I showed her the work and miss ******* said “you are such an inspiration Ruthie, I couldn’t be as motivated as you.” Or something along those lines, which would be fine and I wouldn’t be offended. However, the tone of her voice, which was sort of patronising ‘as if I just went on the potty and did a wee’ well done voice, one where she spoke slowly as though I couldn’t understand her! Like why? I’m not a 2 year old. That’s a memory that I’ll remember because it’s the first time I felt someone was patronising me.

Many people, don’t think some people have a disability if it is not a physical one, such as dyslexia, but as soon as they are told that you have a disability, the patronisation starts. 1800 babies are born in the UK, a year, with cerebral palsy. It is individual to the person, so it can effect on side of the body (called Hemiplegia), it can effect one limb (called Monoplegia) and many more. There are different strengths of each type of cerebral palsy so it can sometimes only affect a child’s speech. This is unnoticeable until the child starts to talk. People, such as teachers, wouldn’t treat people with a disability which is not noticeable differently, so why treat people with a disability that is noticeable like 2 year olds!

Do you want to know why I think people have this idea, that if a person has a disability then they should be treated different to the norm? Well when you think about disabilities you see the differences between a person with a condition and one without that condition. You don’t see the similarities, so in theory in a social situation, you know that the person is different so thus treating him/her not in the same way as ‘normal’ person.  There is one question that I think we need to know the answer to. What is the definition of normal? For all we know, having a disability is normal! But there is a flaw, no-one knows, at first, what the person’s capabilities are resulting in you treating them like they are younger than they are. This is fine until the point when you know what their capabilities are, but you still treat them like they are younger because it is easier or you don’t have an understanding of how they work. Then it turns into discrimination or patronisation which isn’t right. So just because we are disabled don’t treat us any different to other people! 

I don't even know what this is, you can tell I was new at this. I think we can all say this was my first rant. Oh and shout out to my best friend who edited this for me, I AM SO SO SORRY.

blog Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thecpblogger/

This is so cringe I can't say much more.

Happy Easter

Byeeeeeeeeeee

Achievements vs Ableism

Hi,

Okay then, so I've been meaning to post something about this for a while now and I've finally found some motivation from somewhere so I might get on with it.

As a PWD, it makes me deeply uncomfortable how quick we rattle off our personal accomplishments for the sake of impressing our able bodied or disabled peers. Why do we, in the 21st, supposed 'equality' fuelled era, anticipate that an achievement such as 'I went to the shops without a carer' won't be treated seriously and congratulated,as it's something society expects everyone to be able to do.
It's perfectly fine to be proud of your achievements or milestones, but you shouldn't have to prove how "non-disabled" you are to gain social legitimacy or praise.

And as for the disabled community, Distancing yourself from negative,uncomfortable or socially-unaccepted disability clichés belittles many PWD who don't have the level  support or don't have the ability/stamina to accomplish what you may of done. It's just as important to acknowledge that disabled people that are home bound or live in poorer nations are just as valid as the ones who travel the world with countless degrees.

So in short I'm saying that disabled legitimacy shouldn't be Dependent upon conforming with ableist expectations on life experience and productivity.

Byeeeeeeee

Reminder :) :

Hi,

Today I've been seeing a lot of posts on my social media reminding the reader that they always need to strive to work harder than they all ready are.

I just want to remind you lot that working hard all the time, for some, its just not possible. Some people burn out easily. Some are PWD, both mental and physical, that keep them from accomplishing as much as they think they should.

Sure I agree we should all work hard,but ONLY as hard as you know you can. Push yourself, but please don't push yourself to your absolute edge if its dangerous for you to do so. Remember a little bit of work every day adds up. Don't beat yourself up if you can't exert yourself to the level everyone else says you should.

Remember, that whatever pace you go, you're still talking steps in the right direction.  

Byeeeeeeeeeee

(P.s  PWD =  People with disabilities)

I'm fed up

Hi,

I'm fed up. I'm fed up with having a psycho arm, I'm fed up with pain dictating what I can and can't do and I'm fed up of have teachers talking down to me because of this and not understanding. Ughhhhh I've had enough.

Today I made a promise that I'm not sugar coating anything anymore 'cause what's the point?  Why hide what you feel like and then nothing happens to change it? I don't care if its going to change what I'm like- I need to start being real.

To be honest I feel sorry for some of my teachers. Like they put so much effort into lesson planing and then they have to change it all to be inclusive and it's like a rush of panic to their brain, and it's all because of me- the one that has to do things differently. I bet they hate changing the lessons because they are stretched thinly enough with this stupid government in charge. Honestly I take my imaginary hat off to them.

Today I realised that pain really decides whether or not I can do something. Like I've noticed it for a while now but what really scares me is that at the end of the day I 'can't wait' - not the right way to put it- to have a paracetamol to stop it. I mean I'm 12 years old not 88 why is it that bad? I shouldn't need it like that. Now before you all think yeah but I have a disability and stuff but do you really think that I want to be different- I have that enough already.

And you know what I'm so stubbornly ashamed about? Sitting out in stuff like PE. I know it's the stubborn cow side of me but I feel like I'm waste doing it. I should be doing what everyone else is in my head I can and it's not like I'm using the disability card to get out of it, it's just  the claw of pain pins me down and I can't. I absolutely hate it because for me, I would never want to get out of something at school, yes I'm a geek, teachers pet or whatever but I enjoy learning, so sitting out is so out of character  in my head. I'm not one to have many worse enemies but for the few I do have I wouldn't even wish it on them. So that's what it really feels like.

It's funny that my best mate thinks I'm upset all the time, nah it's just pain.

Wow that's a rant and a half (wasn't meant to be) !

Byeeeeeeeeee

COMPETITIVE sports............

Hi,

Disclaimer: Yes this post may offend but I really don't care! The whole concept of blogging is to voice your opinions online and that's exactly what I am doing- I'm not going to hide anything in this post or hold back and it's my opinion so I am not really going to apologise. 

Right now that is out of the way, lets get on with the post..... 

So a few months ago I wrote about PE and whether or not I like it; that all still stands and I enjoy it so much fun  but there's only one thing that I despise about the subject- the competition side of it. I'm not trying to diss really sporty people or anything but from a kid with CP point of view it sucks.

My school's PE department is brilliant and they try to include me in every sport they can and I'm really grateful for that. but that's the staff and quite frankly speaking they are paid to do that, it's part of the job really. What annoys me though, is that the kids are less open minded about that sort of stuff, particularly some girls in set one. These girls are my friends but when sport is involved, to be honest they only care for winning.

I think I first really realised this when my set and their set joined up with one another for a lesson, a teacher was probably off and it was the easiest thing to do. Anyway to make it fair, the teacher decided to mix the sets up for the teams. The majority of the people on my team were from the top set so it was bound to be competitive, I knew that, it's obvious.

I'm not the most sporty of people there is but I try my damn hardest, I'll give myself that. I also am not the most competitive person if I lose, so what?  But I noticed that, especially,the set one girls practically treat me as if I were invisible. At first I shrugged it off but they kept on doing it by then I was really annoyed and left our game to sit out. Not one of them battered an eyelid ; they just carried on. 

My PE teacher saw me sitting out and came over to make sure I was all right, thinking about this now she'd only taught me for a couple of months and still knew when I was angry/annoyed- the power of blogger huh, anyway she could see i was upset about it and asked why and said this was extremely out of character for me, I told her-by then I was almost in tears,almost.

The thing that hurt most was that, if me and one of those girls were in a science class together, they would listen to me and include me. Yet in sports I'm a liability and a burden, a barrier stopping them from winning so they toss me aside and exclude me. I get that I am slow, I limp and that I have a walking stick, I've known this for nearly 13 years now, but that certainly doesn't mean I am incapable of thinking strategically or throwing a ball! My brain works okay it's just my body that doesn't cooperate fully. And what's even worse- they know it!


That's what I hate about competitive sports with people who don't know how I 'work', no one includes us,we are ignored unless someone more senior interferes and we are practically placed on the subs bench.

By the way, we ended up coming second (karma is a powerful vessel ;-) 

Next week we start competition block in PE and yes we are going to be joining up again, I have spoken about people who I work well with to my teacher and I looked at the board of teams on the Friday we broke up- no one,who will include me without me explaining Is on my team, I've told the top set teacher and we'll see what happens.

But of course you can tell, I can't wait! Jk

Byeeeeeeee

Clothing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi,

So I was reading the news recently and in my opinion a major win for disabled people has occurred.

The British retailer Marks and Spencer are going to be releasing a clothing line aimed to help children with special needs. The range will be called m&s and me which includes bodysuits and vests with poppers going up to a size 8 years, which is much appreciated by parents of children with disabilities.

Some of the clothes on the M&S website

By adapting clothing,M&S,which is a huge shop in the UK, are filling a gap in the market and making clothes catered to the needs widely Available.Many disabled children who have special equipment or wear nappies are going to benefit due to the poppers being easy accessible changes instead of having to take the whole garment off.

A spokesman for marks and Spencer has said: "The range currently comprises a small number of products that will be available online in the next few weeks - as with all new ranges, we will closely monitor customer interest and listen carefully to customer feedback on how it should be developed in the future"

I know its only clothes but I feel this is going to make many people's lives so much easier. 

Byeeeeeeeeeee